Valentine’s Kittens style

It’s Valentine’s day, time for a compulsory post about it. Love and sex are so connected with Valentines that we simply cannot remain silent, everybody is talking about it, Valentine’s sales are everywhere (even butcher’s do it – nothing says ILY like a heart-shaped flesh of a dead animal). We have to do something for those who don’t like the banality of this “special” day. Since we hate the romantic clichés – maybe fun, alternative activities to inspire couples?

And then it hit me.

Valentine’s is about couples being in love; it’s a boring, commercialized festival of red roses, hearts and teddy bears. Sure, you can try to run away from the banality of it and have a ton of pizza and messy sex on oily pizza boxes or a sci-fi marathon followed by BDSM fun. But it doesn’t really matter – you’re in this together, you can get through this silly day as a couple.

But what if you’re single? Who will whisper sweet nothings and help you through this kitschy day? Isn’t it the day that reminds everyone that they should be happily in love, otherwise there’s something wrong with them?
For many of you, sex workers & porn may be the answer for Weltschmerz-inducing Valentine’s. And it’s a wonderful solution that we wholeheartedly support. Why not pay someone to brighten your day and give you a healthy boost of endorphins?

Don’t just sit at home – do something, take care of your needs, both emotional and physical.

  • Hire a professional to spend time with you and fulfill your fantasies.
  • Pay an entertainer (cam girl, sexting, whatevs) for her time and effort.
  • Watch some fun, independent porn and masturbate with this shiny new artisan toy bought as a Valentine’s gift for the most important person in your life – you.

You deserve to have fun on this silly day and you too can help the economy – real people will benefit from your need.

Why the hell am I mentioning money? It’s Valentine’s, baby – let’s show we care about each other by spending money and exchanging (mostly) useless, unimaginative gifts.

Just think about this: Americans alone will spend around $20 billion on silly gifts and fancy dinners that are basically extorted from them by the advertisers and societal expectations.

A lot of this money will go to corporations or faceless companies. You, on the other hand, can support real people: a sex worker, an entertainer, an artisan craftsman etc.

Yes, I must admit that I’m fed up with everything being commercialized and superficial. I see the growing need for human contact and real objects made with love and care. Porn created by the biggest companies is getting stale and boring, sex toys produced in China for the mass market suck, lack of empathy for sex workers is abhorrent. We can change it by voting with our wallets.

It’s ok that you’re alone on the Valentines day. It sucks anyways.
Now go and take care of yourself and the people around you.

Mrs Kitten.